(Given at the 5:30 pm Sunday youth Mass at OLP)
Feeling unworthy of a calling is a real thing. I remember my second to last year in seminary, going to my formation director, and expressing feeling completely unworthy to be ordained. He told me this was normal, and guess what? I’d never be worthy of what God was calling me to do, but God was calling me anyway. I had to trust that God does not call the qualified, but rather, by his grace, qualifies those he calls. This relates to a traditional understanding of why Joseph hesitated to be with Mary as we heard from our gospel tonight. Total tangent: Joseph was already married to Mary, as there are two parts to Jewish marriages; the word betrothed in our gospel is a poor translation as it was not the same as modern engagement. Mary was not an unwed mother. Anyway, Joseph felt he could not stay with the mother of the messiah, the virgin with child, prophesied by Isaiah, so divorce was the only way out. He felt he was completely unworthy. Again, divorce could dissolve the first part of the Jewish marriage and was allowed then under the Law of Moses. Joseph felt unworthy of his calling. So God had to intervene and remind him of Mary’s great mission and that she couldn’t do this alone. Joseph ends up trusting God who qualifies the called rather than calls the qualified. Another way to look at it: Joseph thought he wasn’t enough. I hear that saying a lot: be enough, you’re enough. I hate that saying. It’s not true. You and I will never be enough. But God is. And sometimes, life on life’s terms will be too much for us. But that’s okay! You and I don’t have to be enough because God is enough. Because Jesus is enough. He is more than enough, really. He is what makes life worth living. He can help us when life on life’s terms is too much. We can turn to him and pray: Jesus, I am not enough, but you are. Jesus, this is too much for me, please help me, please be enough for me. Joseph understood this. My formation director in seminary understood this. So should we.